November 9, 2004 @ 9:32 am by sean
No, I’m not going to live this way. I’ve got my God to love and I’ve got my God to serve. It’s difficult to think the situation is irredeemable, that it might’ve all been for nothing, but it isn’t like I made the better times all that good for her think I could have ever done better. Perhaps getting what I deserve is best for everyone, though I can’t say I’m not dissapointed. I’m definately not any less sorry or ashamed. ‘What’s done is done is in the past/good things come and go so fast’
I decided long before any of this happened that regardless of my relationship with a female, I’ve got to be happy and that getting married or having a girlfriend would make me a different kind of happy. I’m sure that would be a very wonderful kind of happy, but not having that happy shouldn’t take away from my happiness given to me by loving and being loved by God. So I’m gonna be happy.