July 28, 2004 @ 1:02 am by sean
Woah. Fascinations of fascinations. ‘Being John Malkovich’ was beyond fascinating. Wow. The possibilities….. That was amazing!
I’d kind of wished they’d left more to question, like, I’d rather it ended with John Malkovich going into the portal and then it ending before seeing what would happen. Kind of like how Donny Darko ends, leaving all kinds of questions. Not like the 3rd Matrix though, ’cause I really didn’t care how to make sense of it. I wish the story revolved less around Craig in John. Or I wish it ended half way through, because I understand too much now, and now it’s harder to make up things on my own.
I don’t appreciate sex in movies. Fortunately there was no nudity. Either way, it’s awkward to watch with parents.
So besides what I wished the movie was, it was still increadibly fascinating. I would highly recommend it to anyone.
I’m being forced to make a decision I don’t want to make. I suppose being the one who is planning it would cause me to make this decision if it came. I’m usually quite passive when it comes to decision making. I try to make the decision that would make as many people happy as possible, regardless of my feelings. And I’m OK with that. I’m putting the needs of others before mine. Though I want to cancel it, even though everyone else is OK with going still. Up until now I’ve wanted to cancel it out of spite. Out of spite for the ones who cancelled on me; who cut the last string in the rope; who made me at most, a second priority for the last time; who disrespected me for the last time. But now, I think I’d like to cancel it to be independant. To be OK with not making other people happy. To not need to be needed by other people. Perhaps this isn’t the best situation to do it in. Perhaps if they still want to go, they can, I just won’t. I’m planning it, shouldn’t I be able to cancel it if I want to? Don’t I have that power? Am I wrong to use that power to meet my needs? They wouldn’t even have any of this trip if I didn’t plan it, so what’s it matter if I cancel it?