May 21, 2004 @ 12:06 am by sean
I’m tired. That’s good I suppose. I need sleep for work tomorrow.
It felt like Monday today. I had the last two days off, and they were glorious. If only I could get payed for days like those.
Tuesday I skateboarded(got better at the half cab and almost um, did a pop shove it maybe. Maybe it was a 180, I don’t know.), and I practiced my drums, and I read three different literatures, and I hung out with Ben and Lisa and met a funny kid named Zach. Tuesday was an amazing day.
Wednesday was another Alyson all day day. We went to the DIA with some people she know’s from homeschooling and we saw the James Whistler exhibit. It was ok. I didn’t think it was anything all that special. But he’s famous and whatever, I got to go with a friend so that made it worth while. Then we went for lunch at the people’s house. They are neat people. I like meeting people like that. Two of the ladies are trying to start some school that I don’t remember what it’s called and don’t feel like explaining it. But it’s neat anyway. Then Alyson and I (a bug just flew into the computer screen and crash landed)headed back to her house and psuedo-napped. Just rested kinda. Gwendolyn is a bit of a loud child at times. I was with a friend though, so I really didn’t mind. It was off to youth group from there. I had left youth group just over a year ago because of various reasons, but a new guy started last week and I like him. And I get to see friends when I’m there. (the bug seems to be attempting to walk, but he apparently keeps falling). Then we went back to Ben and Lisa’s apartment after picking up Lisa. Then I drove Alyson home. Her and I spent a lot of time together in the car. That makes me happy. I noticed one way I cheat out of communicating for real is making fun of her. At least she makes fun of me back. And then we fight. It’s all a big joke anyway. I hate when people don’t make fun of me back.
Alyson is the only one home when I don’t work, so next day I have off I’ll (now the bug is stuck on his back, and he just rolled off the little plastic ledge onto the desk) probably spend it with her. I don’t much mind at all, I really enjoy it, though I’m somewhat scared of her mother getting suspicious or something and then start restricting her from hanging out with me like she does with Sean. I like things the way they are. Getting to hang out with Alyson for a whole day, and getting to hang out with other people at night. I’d prefer things to stay this way until, well, until I decide they can change. Carley will be home in about 10 days. I’m excited about that. That will change things a little. But I miss her dearly.
I had a band practice today. We wrote a song. It was great. This is a side project for Sean, and a side project for Ben, but they aren’t in the same band as a uh, project. Sean and I were really the only one’s who played today. Ben put in a little lyrics. Lisa planned for a party, but still has yet to learn bass. We recorded it on his Mac, quite impressive for that tiny little mic. I’m glad to be in a band. They want to play at least one show before I go back. I hope we do.
I’ve got this problem. So I’m going to write about a different one. I suppose this isn’t really a problem necessarily, at least not for me. I feel kinda bad about it though. Perhaps that is the problem. The problem is that I seem to be content where ever I am. When I’m at school I miss my friends at home, but not a whole lot. Like, I love them dearly and would chose them as my only friends for the rest of my life if I had to make that choice; but I know things are going to be all right, so I don’t miss them a lot. I look forward to coming home and want to see them as much as possible. But I have a great time at school. And when I’m home, I don’t really miss school. I miss everyone there, I miss the learning centered atmosphere, I miss some of my classes, I miss learning. But I’ve been having such a great time with my friends here, I don’t really miss it all that much. And even on a smaller scale. I’d rather have days like yesterday over almost any other day, but at work today, it was just work. I missed yesterday. I would rather have done that instead, but I didn’t really mind working. I was fine where I was. I love my family and relatives, but I haven’t seen then in quite a long time now and I miss them, but not urgently. Maybe if they died or something I’d think differently that’d change. The only time I don’t feel as content is at home. I’d rather not be home, I’d rather be out with the people I love. I love my family, but they aren’t really all that much fun. They watch more T.V. than they used to, and my sister works now. I like spending time with my family, just not at home maybe. Jillian has been gone since January, and I love when she is home, I very much prefer her to be home than away, but I’m ok with her being gone. I miss her.
This isn’t to say my friends are expendable or anything. That’s what I feel bad about, I don’t want people to think that. My friends are pretty much the most important thing to me besides God. Because without Him I wouldn’t even have them.
I over heard my younger cousin end a phone conversation with “I don’t have anything else to say.” So I’ve decided to adapt that and stop beating around the bush and say that when I have nothing else to say. So, I don’t want to write anymore right now.